Are Ontario Churches too Fearful?
Some church members in Ontario are itching to get back to church. Their experiences with COVID may have been mild, or they are simply not afraid. Some are struggling with other illness, pain, weakness, or sins. They miss His church, a lot. A few are beginning to ask questions like: should we just show up on Sunday? Even if the elders are holding us back? This is an attempt to help them think this through. This builds somewhat on top of my last post.
A few days ago my bride and I were out for a drive. To get necessities of course. On our way home from town we stopped, as we often do, for lunch beside the lake. We sit in the quiet car, chat, and enjoy some food which she did not have to prepare. It is meant to be a relaxing and rejuvenating moment. For her especially. It is hard to relax these days in Ontario.
As we pulled in to the parking lot, one of those big quad-cab diesel pickups, with giant tires spinning and coal rolling, was driving out onto the lake. Up here people ice fish. They set up a little hut, drill a hole in the ice with an auger, and they catch their lunch. There is quite a village of huts on the lake. Good for them, I say. A reasonable diversion where snow is on the ground for almost half the year, and where Seasonal Affective Disorder is strong. I hope he doesn’t get a fine for committing the crime of chatting while fishing.
Without much thought, I turned and followed. After all, it has been plenty cold at night here lately, and it is February. If that diesel which weighs much more can go, so can I. Right? Masculine logic does not even hesitate. Some of you see where this is going. Driving on thick ice does not feel remotely dangerous to me. I’d quite happily do donuts out in the middle. That stuff could support a semi. There is literally a whole row of cars, pickups, and trailers parked on the ice right over there.
For full disclosure, I was once an adrenaline-junkie. Driving on thick ice is pretty tame for me. I used to whitewater kayak down class V rapids. I got pummeled and pounded and half-drowned quite a few times. And loved it. Often going alone, which was doubly foolish. Then there were a few other similar pursuits and bad driving habits. Sorry mom, honestly. This past is part of the reason why I have to deal with some aches and pains. In retrospect, I have always enjoyed being on the water, but I was sinfully pursuing the rush that comes with risking your life.
My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD,
Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him;
For whom the LORD loves He chastens,
And scourges every son whom He receives. - Hebrews 12:5–6
I now realize that I was in a way wrestling with God. This is a bad idea, take it from me. First, because He is holy and almighty. Second, if you are a child of the covenant and live in sin and out of such motivations, be prepared for some pain. You'll only leave limping. But, He also gives more grace.
If she had not made eye contact with me at a very young age, I suspect I might be living out of a van somewhere right now and chasing waterfalls. Now, I stick to the rivers and the lakes. In my former community of extreme sports, a few acquaintances died, which helped restrain me. But it was my bride that saved me, in part, for a time. By God’s grace, all through the years of that phase of traveling to rivers and mountains, there was a cute little anchor that kept me coming back home. Keeping me nearer to Him as well. No regrets, a gift from the Lord. God’s providences are good.
In God’s providence the greater fears I now face involve interpreting the Word, public speaking, and some vestiges of anxiety and depression. But facing all that has been beneficial, it brings me to my knees and to trust in Him. I have been learning to be a fool, and this is good. (1 Corinthians 4:10) I look back at His providences and realize that one part of my character is that I am a habitual fear-facer. That does not mean I lack fear. Far from it. There is something within me that sees fears and dangers as something that ought to be faced and conquered. That affects the decisions I make, though I also believe that I have well-held convictions and a calling from God. It just took a lot of kicking against the pricks to answer.
As I get a little older, I realize there can be selfishness mixed in standing atop the latest mountain. Or even touching the mountain, watch out for that. (Ex. 19:12) If I am not careful, I find validation in facing fears in itself, instead of in Christ who has conquered. Self-worship and Mr. Legality can lurk in my heart. That tendency to face fears has worked out at times for the worse, and at times for the better. But it requires extra self-examination and prayer before leaping. It requires learning to think about God and others first. Motives matter.
Now, back to the frozen lake. I would have liked to sit somewhere out in the middle of the lake on that thick ice and enjoy the view. That kind of fear was conquered long ago. My bride, however, was not having it. She was not terrified, she is reasonable. She simply said, this is not relaxing. In that firm, kind, but wise way some of us are privileged to be on the receiving end of. The tone we know is wise to listen to. I looked at her, and loved her, and we turned around and parked on terra-firma. I enjoyed my lunch, and our conversation.
When your bride has been through many trials, you begin to learn that there are times to hold back and times to step out. Some days, she steps out onto the ice before I do. We laugh, together. Walk together. Try a little tenderness.
My advice is this: don’t push the bride too much. Neither your literal bride, (1 Peter 3:7) nor the church. (Revelation 21:2) If she does not want to be out on thin ice yet, she does not belong there. Yes, the church seems either sleepy or fearful or both to some of us, but pushing or prodding helps little. It is too often self-defeating. If you go out and try to slay some Egyptians before your time, you'll likely end up in the wilderness for a few years. (Exodus 2:11-15) It's much easier for some of us to step out when we already fled to the wilderness.
Get on your knees. Have prayer meetings. Pray for your pastor and elders. Prayer has been at the root of revival again and again. (Acts 1:14) I suspect there will be more power in that secret prayer meeting than in breaking down the doors of a church or pushing your pastor. The Lord will not share His glory with another. (Isaiah 42:6-8) Hopefully, one Lord's day soon, they will leave those doors unlocked or make other arrangements.
Meanwhile, grow in the exercise of true religion. Visit which ever widows and orphans would like a visit. (James 1:27) Look at your own heart, think about your own personality and past. Repent. Confess that we and our fathers have sinned. (Daniel 9:8-9) Ask your authorities to let my people go. Pray for the Holy Spirit. (Luke 11:13) Be absolutely certain, is your trust truly in Him? Is it love? Or is it still misplaced, somewhere in your own wisdom or strong character, or even rebellion?
Then appeal to your elders again with kindness, and let them know you have been praying especially much for them. And make sure to let them know that you love them and want to assemble because of that love. (Hebrews 10:24-25)
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.” - 1 Corinthians 13:1
My wife is wiser than I. I am blessed to know her, and be restrained by her. I am also certain she loves me, and so I listen to her voice. Some of the finest Christians I know are similar in character. Some still COVID concerned, and certainly not ready to step out. Some of them have their reasons, and I fully respect them. We ought not to assume their motives, they may not even relate to fear at all. Be careful to remember that your actions will affect them and your relationship with them as well. It will affect your pastor, his family, elders, or friends. Be absolutely certain you are acting in love and respect. Yes, love for God trumps all, and this is why some of us think as we do. But love for the brethren must be mixed in there too, or else it is actually no love for God at all. (1 John 4:21)
As for me, I have also learned a lot from some of the COVID conscientious Christians this past year. I have seen the fruit of the Spirit growing in them as they have wrestled with this situation from another perspective:
…the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another. (Galatians 5:22–26)
Do not forget about them either. Pray for them as well. We want a mixed-multitude to walk out of here together, following our Mediator. With trophies of grace in hand. (Exodus 12:36-38)
I will, however, end with a word of sober advice for the cautious and the politicians. This culture will cancel Christians regardless of what we say or do to appease them. They cannot but do this now. One day, whether we like it or not, we may be much safer on the "thin ice" of this world because that will be the place that will be nearer to the Lord. That may not even be optional in the future. (Matthew 10:33) If you lean towards caution, be careful that your heart is not ruled by fear. I will be careful not to make that accusation, I have my own baggage. But I also know from experience that fear is a tricky thing, it lurks on all sides of these issues. It motivates what it ought not to. The answer to that is in the love of Christ, and true belief in His death and resurrection.
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:18–19)
No matter which side you find yourself on: don't let that fear be your motive. Let it be love for Christ, and love for His church that compels you.
